NCAA Title Game

After going 0-2 in the final four matchup, I have worked especially hard to bring you a winner in tonight's game. I consulted my Crystal Ball but it seems as if the batteries are dead. I also consulted my trusty dartboard but it seems as if the dart does not want to land on any team. As my last resort, I was going to do an in depth mascot indicator analysis but I cannot, for the life of me, figure out what a tarheel is. Then I decided to research a bit more and evidently, a tarheel is someone from the state of North Carolina. Seems like the moniker came about during the civil war. The story goes as follows. There was a battle in Virginia, where their supporting column retreated, but North Carolina troops fought alone. The victorious troops were asked in a condescending tone by some Virginians, who had retreated, "Any more tar down in the Old North State, boys?" The response came quickly: "No, not a bit; old Jeff's bought it all up." The Virginians asked: "Is that so? What is he going to do with it?" The reply: "He is going to put it on you'ns heels to make you stick better in the next fight." Well seems like the boys from North Carolina are a stubborn lot who are not afraid of a battle. Michigan State's mascot is the Spartan, who has been glorified in the movie 300. If you ever watched the movie, then you would know that the Spartans are also a stubborn lot who are not afraid of a battle. Thus, the Mascot indicator proved to be fruitless as well in pointing the Chuck to a winner in tonight's battle.

We all know that North Carolina has a better team and we all know that they are capable of running this Michigan State team out of the building. Michigan State, however, is playing inspired basketball and they have proven to the nation that they belong here. The line is set at UNC favored by 7 1/2 points. I thought that Villanova could hang with Carolina and was proven woefully wrong. I have agonized over whether the Spartans can keep this game competitive or if Carolina will breeze past them like they have done against every other team. I pondered every angle of this contest and after much deliberation, I was still at a loss. My head was pounding from a painful migraine, which was no doubt precipitated by attempting to pick a side, and I decided to lay down for a bit. Well I eventually dozed off and I had a dream, where Magic Johnson holding a phat burger summoned me to come over. In short, he told the Chuck that the right side on this game was Michigan State and I should not be fretting so much. He continued to berate me for my lack of wisdom and as he was talking to me, chunks of his phat burger, which he was now chomping on, were being splattered across my face. Well, you get the picture. I woke up in a cold sweat and promptly called my man and placed 500 units on the Spartans.

The Red Sox game had been postponed, so I will not have any action on that game. I will post any further MLB games later. For those who are so quick to discount the Chuck, I suggest you cover yourself with honey and run through a well stocked apiary.